The BurgerBlog

Paramore

If Hot Topic could create their perfect band, it would probably be Paramore–maybe that’s why they’re so easy to hate. The cookie-cutter pop-punk quartet, headed by lead singer Hayley Williams, is a modern Avril Lavigne: strong female vocals, a teenage angst focus, and rockin’ attitude. Featured on modern teen idols like the Twilight movie, Paramore’s new album, brand new eyes, doesn’t reveal anything new about the genre.

That’s not to say the album isn’t fantastic if cookie-cutter pop-punk is your music of choice. The best song on the album and second track, “Ignorance,” is a complex, lyrical rock anthem for the dumped. “The same tricks that, that once fooled me/They won’t get you anywhere/I’m not the same kid from your memory/Well, now I can fend for myself.” Coupled with slamming drums and catchy riffs, this track is already all over the radio and there to stay; be prepared to be sick of it by Thanksgiving.

“Brick by Boring Brick,” “Where the Lines Overlap,” “Playing God,” and “Decode” continue to showcase Williams’s strong vocals and lyrics, along with catchy guitar riffs and drummed out accents. These songs showcase the band’s self-assessment of maturing beyond Riot!.

However, maturity certainly isn’t something Paramore has mastered. “Looking Up,” “The Only Exception,” and “Misguided Ghosts” are dull attempts to seem “well-rounded.” It might fool the fourteen and fifteen year olds who masturbate to MTV’s qualifications for ‘good’ music, but it doesn’t fool those who know that even balance of ballads and rock songs does not make a good record. The juvenile lyrics on these songs only further detract from brand new eyes as a whole.

Luckily, as stated earlier, Paramore provides a variety of fist pumping teen anthems. brand new eyes does not provide for anything new, thought provoking, or inspiring, but it does rock hard enough for those older than fifteen to appreciate. Paramore has potential; as the band ages, they will likely produce better and better music. Until then, we can only hope that they stay together long enough to see that to fruition.

Rating: C+

Recommended Tracks: Ignorance, Brick by Boring Brick

Toss These Tracks: The Only Exception, Misguided Ghosts

Jeffree Star

If Madonna and Peaches had a child (as-if they would ever procreate?), it would be the posh homosexual internet icon Jeffree Star, famous for his MySpace page and the single, “I Must be Emo.” Jeffree, after several EPs and releases on the web, has finally brought forth her first full-length album, Beauty Killer. Hype surrounding yesterday’s release have sky rocketed Jeffree’s MySpace hits, her references on Twitter, and the album’s placement on most-purchased alternative album on iTunes: it is number 12. Despite the LP’s instant commercial success, I am not impressed.

At least, that was my final impression. The first two tracks on Beauty Killer are fantastic. In a wall of electro-synth pop sound, the listener can instantly feel the stirring club mix moving their heart and toes to the beat. “Prisoner,” the second song and first single on the album, is the standout song on Beauty Killer. It’s fun, sexy, and sure to reach the ears of horny teenagers ready to rock out to something new.

Despite the success of the first two songs, Jeffree uses his clear vocals to portray immature images of violence and sex. “Pretend I love you for another year/Starve myself so I’ll fucking disappear/Your red-dipped fingers look like strawberries/But these gashes look like self-injuries.” What the fuck? Ms. Star, after the brilliance of the first two songs, why would you kill a good thing? The backbeat is a lot of fun, but the tactless violence in this piece ruins the song.

“Beauty Killer,” “Electric Sugar Pop” and “Fame & Riches, Rehab Bitches,” blend together in their painful sugarcoated sex anthems. For tweens, these will be the best songs on the album, but for those of us who have a more sophisticated taste, we might want to cry about what else Jeffree could have offered.

“Love Rhymes With Fuck You” and “Fresh Meat” sound like Britney Spears was put into a weed whacker, spit out, and then asked to make music. It’s god-awful. The misguided screamo adds nothing to “Love Rhymes With Fuck You” except repulsion.

Fortunately, Jeffree has a few redeeming tracks. “Bitch, Please!” isn’t classy, but the well-thought out lyrics and groovy electro beats are. The references are obscure and “huh” inducing. Observe:

Slide my panties off in your Lamborghini/TMZ just saw my coochie like I was Britney/Be Flo Rida an spin me right round round/But don’t try to bite me like Chris Brown/Make my bottle pop like a Pussycat Doll/Smoked out Michael Phelps and won a gold medal

The song is full of similar zingers. Well done, Jeffree.

The other tracks are eh. Nothing spectacular, kind of like the entire album.

Rating: C-

Recommended Tracks: Get Away With Murder, Bitch, Please!, Prisoner

Toss These Tracks: Love Rhymes with Fuck You, Fresh Meat

Bo Burnham

Before YouTube I was just a skinny white kid/That thought he was funnier, & cooler/Than he actually was/Now, not much has changed/But I have a shitload of money

Bo Burnham, the internet sensation, has recently signed his soul to Comedy Central Records. The 19-year-old Massachusetts resident came out with Bo Burnham, celebrating his comedic music humor that started with “I’m Bo Yo,” the YouTube video with almost ten million hits. The poppy piano and guitar lead to easy listening, but the lyrics, granted intelligent and humorous, grows old after the second listen.

Nowhere near the musical and comical genius of Tom Lehrer, Burnham repeats the same chords over and over (see “Rehab Center for Fictional Characters”) while rapping/singing over them. Nonetheless, Burnham uses clever modern pop culture references and puns (“I treat my objects like women”) to litter his music. The first time around, Bo seems very witty, but after a while his jokes seem tasteless.

From “The Perfect Woman,” an ode to Helen Keller as the perfect woman, to “Dictatortot,” the story of Hitler as a baby, Burnham only fails to offend one group of people: rich white straight northern males, just like him (though heterosexual is a might bit questionable, considering how hard he insists that he’s straight). Now for those of us who can take the 19-year-old’s subject matter, his lyrics are fantastic. The young white yank raps in “Bo Fo’ Sho,’” “Like a tampon thief, I had to pull some strings,” and “I’m circumcised ’cause I don’t come from the hood.” Funny? Yes. Funny the third time? Eh.

What comes with Bo Burnham is what makes the CD worthwhile. It comes with a DVD of Burnham live and some of his YouTube clips. Burnham is far more personable when you can see his puppydog face with priceless expressions. I say, save the music for visual and audio stimulus. Bo Burnham is definitely best the first time around, so don’t spoil the surprise for yourself if you’re planning on seeing him live. He’s certainly entertaining, but not as good as Demitri Martin and Dane Cook.

Rating: C

Recommended Songs: I’m Bo Yo, High School Party

Toss These Songs: Klan Kookout, Rehab Center for Fictional Characters

Making April

Piano rock is cool: think Augustana, Jack’s Mannequin, or Ben Folds. Piano-emo-pop-rock can be cool, I think, if someone could pull it off. Actually, someone can: Making April. Before releasing their debut album, The Egg Hunt, Making April had already been featured on MTV’s Laguna Beach and caught the eye of major record label Universal Republic (Chamillionaire, Colbie Caillat, Hinder). Now The Egg Hunt, which was released this past March, is here to test out Making April’s hype.

The first track on The Egg Hunt is presented with a whirlwind of guitar, held out synths, and heavy drumbeats. It silences, as the lead singer’s bright voice chirps, You were here when I wrote this one/So when you hear it you’ll know that it’s yours. Sean Scanlon’s voice has an uncanny similarity to Andrew McMahon: whiny bite, clear lyrics, and sweet falsetto. “So Bad” sounds like something Jack’s Mannequin would have produced on their Everything In Transit album, which is a good thing. Though the lyrics aren’t as inventive as Jack’s Mannequin’s, “So Bad” sounds made-for-radio, and if given the opportunity would be a sure-fire hit.

After “So Bad,” Making April’s songs unfortunately begin to blend together with unmemorable lyrics and piano licks. Though peppy and playful, both “Brighter Bright” and “Bailey” begin to shrivel under bland similarity. Listen to “Stay The Night.” Making April has blatantly copied the piano riff off of “Dark Blue.” Ouch.

“Wide Awake” may be the saving grace for The Egg Hunt. Settling chords and acoustic guitar (save the passionate solo mid-song) make up for the cheesy and desperate lyrics. With the makings of a Disney Channel Original Movie theme, “Wide Awake” will appeal to a vast audience.

“Hey Katie” is also a memorable track on The Egg Hunt. Reminiscent of Making April’s EP Runaway World’s hit single “Roses and Butterflies,” the quick-paced track harps on fame. Scanlon belts, And maybe if this label guy/Signs my band then I’ll be a rock star/And you’ll watch me play at an LA bar. Bouncy and cocky, “Hey Katie’s” playful nature is catchy enough for any pop fan.

The Egg Hunt isn’t the best album you’ll ever hear; in fact it only has a few gems out of the vast similar sounding piano tracks. Fortunately, if piano rock is what tickles your fancy, The Egg Hunt’s riffs (when unique) are plentiful and original. Sadly, piano riffs aren’t the only thing a band needs to make a good album.

Rating: C

Recommended Songs: So Bad, Hey Katie, Wide Awake

Toss These Songs: Let It Ride

Anarbor

Hearing Colours Seeing Sounds wasn’t a fantastic EP, but that was not what drew me to Anarbor in the first place. This year’s EP Free Your Mind demonstrates significant band growth. Anarbor has begun to sound like a mix of Fall Out Boy, Panic! At The Disco, and The Academy Is…. Anarbor has seemed to have found a niche that has already been conquered, but because the sound is familiar, fun, and poppy, it’s an easy listen. Thankfully, they have also diverted their attention to fixing their lyrical mishaps. Free Your Mind is a fantastic demonstration of how a band can grow, and I can only hope that they will push themselves further to discover their own sound.

Once again, their first song, “Let The Games Begin” is the best track on the album. It is heavily guitar laden, with a chorus screaming “BANG BANG!” to add intensity. The flashy vocals mixed with the start and stop rhythm is uncanny to Fall Out Boy’s latest album, and this is a good thing.

“The Brightest Green” is my favorite track on the album. It once again shows off Echeverri’s talent as a vocalist, with a joyride of ups and downs, falsetto and Cute is What We Aim For sounding rock. Anarbor also managed to clean up “Where The Wild Things Are (Monsters),” and it is now a far more enjoyable track than what they produced on Hearing Colours Seeing Sounds.

In “You And I” and “Halfway Sober,” Anarbor unfortunately falls back into their original problem: crappy lyrics. “Halfway Sober” whines, “And I’m only halfway sober/And it’s not getting me any closer/When words got me down/You keep me up” and “You And I” complains, “Without you, there’s no reason for my story/And when I’m with you I can always act the same/Forever, yeah if we’re together/We can make it better.” Ouch. And After two unremarkable songs, the closing song’s fantastic lyrics get muddled. Echeverri belts in “Always Dirty, Never Clean,” “I’ll take dignity over industry/My wardrobe has never meant shit to me/I’ll sell my/songs, but never my soul/And what the fuck happened to rock and roll?” Well said, Echeverri! If you could write like that for the rest of the album, Anarbor would be much further along than it is now.

Anarbor needs to grow balls to make a sound outside of the many wellknowns that they emulate. The poppy songs will grow old over time, but for now they’re just fun; they will not “free your mind.” Anarbor has growing to do, but they’ve already made great leaps for a new band.

Rating: C+

Recommended Songs: The Brightest Green, Let The Games Begin, Always Dirty Never Clean

Toss These Songs: You And I

Shiny Toy Guns did it the old fashioned way: they weren’t the children of rock stars and didn’t buy into a quick one hit wonder scheme. They made their way to a music contract through a MySpace fan base and some really good music. We Are Pilots brings an 80’s pop flavor to the current alternative scene to present some new ideas to the music industry.

Shiny Toy Guns

Shiny Toy Guns has a high paced approach to their music. The first two songs, “You Are the One” and “Le Disko” are must-downloads. “You Are the One” is an energetic love ballad that is fun to listen to and doesn’t grow old. “Le Disko” has been completely commercialized; you’ll find it on TV and on the radio. It’s there for good reason. Carah Faye, Shiny Toy Guns’ female vocalist, brings an angry edge that makes the track sexy and headstrong. Think of a movie where the protagonist walks away from an exploding building casually. “Le Disko” should be the song in the background.

The first two songs sadly don’t speak for the rest of the album. “Starts With One,” “When They Came for Us,” “Waiting,” “Shaken,” and “Weather Girl” are all boring tracks, and they make up 40% of the album. It becomes difficult to wade through We Are Pilots to find decent songs when Shiny Toy Guns injected rubbish that draws away from their gems, like “Rainy Monday” and “Jacky Will Save Me.” Unfortunately, the five dull tracks also highlight what is wrong with this band. When male vocalist Chad Petree sings, he sounds good. When he goes into a falsetto, it’s not so good, even though that seems to be his disposition. The hooks are nothing new. Synths alone do not make a song.

The tracks on We Are Pilots are largely hit or miss. Shiny Toy Guns needs to keep to their high paced sound at the beginning of the album; it works for them. Also, Carah Faye’s vocals are fantastic. Her tracks are widely fun and easy to listen to. She has since left Shiny Toy Guns. We should expect great things from her, and from Shiny Toy Guns once they get their act together.

Rating: C

Recommended Songs: Le Disko, Rainy Monday, You Are the One

Toss These Songs: Weather Girl, Waiting

Welcome to the BurgerBlog, a music review site for music lovers. This blog is apt to review anything, from U2 to Dave Barnes to Fergie, and will throw fastballs at the artists as they fight for the coveted A-grade Burger. The grading system is similar to that of high school; the bands who don’t try fail, those who are average get C’s, etc etc. Enjoy!